The Adventures of Bigfoot and Steve

Let’s talk about the frayed fabric of time and space for a minute, readers.

So in the science fiction world (aka one of my foremost areas of expertise, right behind “South Korean men’s haircuts” and “nicknames for people named Steve”) there are these things called Temporal Tipping Points. Essentially, to science fiction fans (read: giant crying nerd lords), Temporal Tipping Points are those moments in time when everything essentially hangs in the balance; think of living embodiment of the “precipice” except instead of a rock it’s a sad Star Trek fan sitting in a basement writing FanFiction. Temporal Tipping Points are moments that define a person, where their life has a chance at a new beginning or a new path. Like getting married and having your first kid. Or like that summer I dabbled briefly in sasquatchery. It was a defining moment in the life and times of Ashley A. Miller and not just a cry for help, Mom!

Where was I going with this again?

Oh yeah! TTPs! ….actually, scratch that abbreviation, readers. That sounds like a woodland disease you’d get after spending a week in the Idahoan wilderness looking for a cryptic, hairy biped.

So the point I’m trying to make is that each new school year marks the passing of another Temporal Tipping Point in this timeline we call life. Anything could happen. I could drop out and join a band call “Bigfoot and the Babes”. I could get a mohawk from a South Korean gentleman named Steve. I could. But I won’t, obviously….

Actually, you know what? Maybe.

We’ll see. The night is young and I have a hankering for comedic hairstyles.

The important factor that all science fiction intellects (read: geeky geeks from the United Federation of Geekton) agree upon is that Temporal Tipping Points are very much a personal issue. You decide you own outcome (insert obligatory Brave reference here)—you are the one who decides which way each and every TemTipPoi goes. Ohhhh, I like that abbreviation. It sounds exotic. Like “Feng shui” or “chipotle”.  The TemTipPoi defines you, but you turn around and kick its ass And that, readers, very well may be the most aggressively poetic sentence I have ever written. It’s violently tender. It’s…disturbingly emotional, like Steve’s work-ethic.

Anyways, this broad, ramble of a weepy Doctor Who aficionado was really meant to give you a rare insight into my mind. I’m starting my 15th school year today and I’m actively trying to make this Temporal Tipping Point matter in the best possible way. That’s what I strive to do, what I always strive to do. Sometimes it works out and life gains a special new outlook… and other times it ends with me in some backwoods country with a group of adults who look like extras from Deliverance, searching for Bigfoot and getting questionable haircuts from Steve (I’m going to milk those jokes for longer than you are probably going to be comfortable with, readers. Apologies).

So that’s kind of where I am emotionally.

Today is a Temporal Tipping Point. There are French fries in the cafeteria. There are worse ways to spend a Thursday.

Next week I promise my posts will be decidedly less sappy and filled with more exposition than a nature documentary about one hairdresser’s quest to give a large, mysterious ape-man a haircut (okay, I admit, that one was a bit of a stretch. I’m just embarrassing myself at this point).

Until then,

Ashley A. Miller

P.S. The picture attached was suppose to be of Steve. I'm no artist, readers. Not like Steve. No one is like Steve.


Ashley is a Junior Creative major from Payette, Idaho.